If There Was Ever an Anger that Called for Spiritual Growth to Appease It

It's the anger of being raped as a kid by a priest, then growing up and going to the Catholic Church for help, and getting nothing. So then you go to THE support group that magically appeared claiming it grew out of grassroots, only to find that even this support group is working with a hidden agenda. No matter where you turn, all decks are stacked to retain the status quo of influence and power for the Vatican's Church.

If there was ever an anger that cried out for biblical channels of reconciliation, it's anger that results from the mistreatment by the Catholic Church of its sex crime victims.

So I've made a commitment to go to this Bible based Anger Management group every Tuesday at 11 AM, because in that group we do things like, today, going to the source, deconstructing the St. Francis Prayer. We strive for the sanity to accept the things we cannot change, courage to change the things we can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

TODAY:

The main message of the session was that some battles are just too large, and I don't have the resources to do more than I can do.

Some battles you have to leave for God to fight. Turn them over.

AND AS CLASS CONTINUED
this image came into my head.

I'm like one small fishing boat in the Gulf of Mexico today with one vacuum trying to suck up all that oil gushing from the BP well.

The sea of data I try to surf through writing on this topic is astounding, shocking. Go to bishop accountability and see the endless lists of predator priests, under each letter of the alphabet, then see the list of documents and news stories that pertain to each priest. It becomes overwhelming, this endless stream of continuing screens of newsprint, you scroll down and there's more and more and more.

These battles in the Gulf and in the Vatican are both evoking God-sized angers, they are both biblical proportioned battles, and they are both bigger than any of us humans. At some point you do have to trust God and turn it over to him.

It's bigger than all of us.

As one blogger writing all alone, with NO NETWORK OF SUPPORT ANYWHERE, I'm like one small fishing boat in June 2010 trying to suck up all that oil gushing into the Gulf of Mexico.

More notes from Anger Management on Tuesdays will be coming here in this new Anger Management blog site on blogspot at City of Angels 14. In fact I have a stack of notes from past few weeks to type in, but I also have to get up at 5 AM tomorrow for my paid job.

For now what will keep my emotions stable is acceptance that I can only do so much in one day, in one hour, one paragraph at a time. I have five years worth of notes now, and files and files of documents to analyze. Here at City of Angels 14 with Anger Management. At City of Angels 15, watch for continued coverage of the pedophile epidemic and coverup in the Roman Catholic Church, carried over from City of Angels 8 2010, which we are going to leave for now exactly like it is.

Time to disentangle from all false relationships that developed from the false structure of a false support group for victims. Time to start over from scratch, deconstruct myself, and figure out what really happened.

Stay tuned...